The Other Side of Giving

II Corinthians 9:7 tells us that God loves a cheerful giver. Some people do give cheerfully, but many have a tough time with that. Last week I said that we get (have the privilege) of giving to God’s work through His church. This time, I want to look at the other side of giving. The side that is not so cheerful.

Some folks have a hard time giving cheerfully because their financial picture is bleak. They have over-obligated their income. This happens to people of all income levels. Several years ago, I read a news magazine article that claimed the average American family spends 110% of its income. How does anyone get happy about giving away 10% or more of his income if he is already spending more than he is making? If someone in this financial shape decides to become a tither, how can he do it? Some folks say, “Just have faith and give, then God will take care of everything.” I am the last one to say that God can’t do something, but I have found that He expects us to do our part, too. Some people are so far in debt that if they give 10%, they are not really giving their own money. They are giving away money that belongs to someone they have promised to pay. Seems to me, that is a form of stealing, and I don’t think God takes too kindly to the breaking of the 8th commandment, even if it enables the person to give. I suggest that the over-obligated person, who truly wants to become a cheerful giver, should set tithing as a goal and plan a strategy to pay off bills. Then he can enjoy the honor of giving. In the meantime, he should begin giving a small percentage, and, as bills are paid off, increase that percentage. I believe God blesses that kind of faith.

There are some people who give to get. The hard fact is that some preachers encourage this attitude. I once saw a television preacher look straight into the camera and say, “I guarantee, if you send $50 to my ministry, God will give you that job you need, or the raise in pay you have been hoping for.” I think he had a desperate need for money to build something important: like a Six Flags over Jesus theme park. (A few years later that particular preacher got caught up in a sex and money scandal and wound up spending several years in prison.) It is very true that God promises to bless those who give generously. The thing that is often forgotten is that God gets to choose what the blessing will be. If you give some money, even sacrificially, so that you can get even more money, you may well be disappointed. God may choose to bless you financially, but He may instead bless you with the ability to do without the new car, or house you were hoping for. He may bless you by teaching you how to be contented without the raise, or by helping you find a training opportunity for a job in a new field. Make no mistake, God blesses the giver. The giver has to be ready for whatever blessing God decides to give.

The other side of giving shows up another way: when people give to the Lord, but keep strings attached. Sometimes people feel that because they give to the church they should have the final say on how their money is used and what the church does. If they don’t like a program or a staff member, they withhold, or threaten to withhold, their tithe. Perhaps they make a lovely gift in memory of a loved one, and then limit the ways that gift (a room, a building, a table, etc.) can be used. This kind of thinking can cripple a church. The church winds up worrying about pleasing people who have already passed on, instead of reaching the lost.

Finally, it is hard to be cheerful about giving if you continue to think about what else you could have done with the money. Often new tithers do this. They can’t help thinking, “If only I had kept that 10%, I would have enough to take that fine vacation, buy that boat, or order a bigger steak.” The good news is that if they persist in tithing, most people will grow out of this attitude, but for some people it proves to be extremely difficult.

Let us examine our attitudes toward giving and toward what we have given. Are you giving your money, or someone else’s? As you give, are you planning what you will do with the financial blessing you expect God to give you? When you put your offering in the plate, do you let go of it? When you give, can you be excited that God is going to use it, or do you brood about what you could have spent it on? – Or are you becoming a cheerful giver.

Wow! We Get to Give!!

Christ-followers are called on to be giving people. All of us are to be givers. Some folks have the spiritual gift of giving, or liberality, and are wired to give very generously. Often these folks have a lot of resources to share, but not always. Some folks, who don’t have much, are gifted to give far beyond what would be expected. The rest of us, even if we don’t have the gift of giving, do have the role of giving. I am one of those people. I love to give, and I feel honored to fulfill the role of giving my tithe and more, but I am not particularly gifted in giving. When someone with the gift of giving sees a need, his/her first move is to reach for his wallet. My first moves are to try to figure out a way to keep the problem from repeating itself (gift of administration), and how to learn from the situation (teaching). When someone who is a gifted giver suggests we all chip in, I am glad to do that. Often, I wish I had thought of doing it, but it is not generally my first reaction.

The Bible teaches a lot about giving. In the Old Testament a tithe (10%) is required to support the ministry of the temple. (If you read closely, it looks like the tithe is required three times a year so that would be a 30% annual gift) Old Testament people didn’t feel like they were giving an offering until after they had put in their tithe. The tithe reminds us that all we have comes from God, and “returning the tithe” is the way for us to acknowledge his generosity to us. So when you hear people talk about tithes and offerings, it is not really two words for the same thing. Tithes are what God requires, while offerings are our gifts to him and his work. The tithe was to support the temple, today, that would be supporting the church. Offerings might be for many things, like building projects, mission work, or special needs.

In the New Testament, money was a major topic for Jesus, and the Apostle Paul urged the church at Corinth:
On the first day of every week, each one of you should set aside a sum of money in keeping with his income, saving it up, so that when I come no collections will have to be made. 1 Corinthians 16:2 (NIV)
This could indicate a sliding percentage scale. In light of what the Old Testament says, (of which Paul was a major student) 10% is the baseline of giving for the Christ-follower. If God has enabled us to have a better income, we should expect that he may well want us to give away more.

Giving is to be a joyous experience. We get to be part of what God is doing! God allows us to share in his great work in this world. What a privilege! What an honor to be allowed to partner with him! God could have chosen another way to finance his mission, but he his chosen method is to enable us to make a living, and then rely on us to share our living with his work.

Next time: “The Other Side of Giving”

God's Answers to Our Prayers

Yes it is true that God offers three answers to our prayers: Yes, No, and Wait. In my last posting I spent some time discussing the fact that God gets to choose which answer He gives to any particular prayer. This time, I want to look at these three answers. We’ll start with the one that may be the most difficult to accept, then move to the one that is most difficult to live with and finally with the one we all hope for when we pray.

If God is truly our heavenly Father and has our best interests at heart, He must, from time to time, tell us “No.” It is a poor father who never says no to the child he loves. No keeps the child from harm and from the wrong path. God’s no’s to us do the same. In addition, He knows the future and how we are designed to fit into it. Many times His no’s not only keep us from going the wrong way, but also keep us on the best way. For us, just like for a child, no is hard to accept. It goes against what we want now, and it may go against what we have carefully thought out. God’s no may go against our best judgment; in fact, we may not even be able to see how no can be the right answer. That is when we must bend our will to accept God’s wisdom.

The good thing about no is that it can be freeing. It can establish boundaries and help us focus on who God wants us to be and what He wants us to do. My wife was diagnosed with severe rheumatoid arthritis on her 18th birthday. The doctor told an athletic, beauty queen, pianist, valedictorian that she had a disease that would cripple her. It just didn’t seem right. In all her young life anything she tried, she had mastered. She thought, as did I when we met and married, that this disease would not stand. We were sure that God would give her a healing. We prayed for it. All our friends prayed for it. In addition, Tina tried all the drugs, vitamins, diets, and quackery she could find thinking that one of them might be the way God would use to remove the pain to heal her.

Instead, twelve years later she was confined to a wheel chair and dying from a side effect of the arthritis. The doctors were telling her that, at best, she would never walk again. The pain was so great that it would wake her up in the middle of the night. One night, as I sat up with her, she told me that she felt that the Lord had told her no concerning her healing. I argued with her that the answer was wait, but she said she was okay with no. She went on to explain that with wait, she had been putting a lot of things on hold “until I feel better”. Now that she had the assurance that her answer was no, she could begin living life and dealing with the abilities she had, rather than sitting and waiting until she felt like her old self. So, she started getting the most out of each day and did as much as her little body would let her. She learned new skills, found new interests, and discovered a new purpose for her life, and a different Tina.

Rheumatoid Arthritis changed her life. A “Yes” from God would have meant a healing that would have enabled her to continue with her old vision and purpose of her life. Accepting the no allowed her to find out what else God had for her to do. As a result, even though, R.A. changed her life, it didn’t ruin it. Her health is now better, but she still struggles every day with the disease. In the last 23 years she has had 43 surgeries. More important than that, she has learned to walk again, graduated from college, become a children’s pastor and ordained as minister. Tina began writing and by now has written children’s Sunday school curriculum for more than 20 years. She is the author of 6 children’s ministry books. She is now the editor of the children’s ministry magazine, “K!”, and writes an online children’s church curriculum, “Kitchen”, for Kidzmatter, and a sought-after children’s ministry workshop leader.

God sometimes answers no, but if He does, He has something else in mind for us. We may not see it right away. In fact, we may not see it until all things are clear to us in eternity. Obviously, no is not our first choice, but it is God who does the choosing. If He is truly our Lord and we are truly His followers, then let us put our trust in Him.